I’ve tried to put up sites for my art many times in the past. I would get to the stage of installing WordPress, picking out a theme, compiling images, making an introduction post — and then, nothing. For some people, blank sheets of paper and notebook pages are terrifying; for me, it’s a blog that’s just about set up and only needs my words, images, and regular updates to make it work.
I think — especially in art — my high standards tend to defeat me. Which is not to say that I don’t want high standards, but they’re such barriers to even just starting something, sometimes. Or, well, completing it. I remember when I was still in graduate school, I missed a lot of major submissions because I was so obsessed with fine-tuning my papers and problem sets to perfection, and would rather not submit at all if my submission wasn’t going to be all that excellent anyway. I feel the same for many illustrations; I have quite a few that I’ve left unfinished, because it obviously wasn’t going to match the image I was holding in my head.

And yet, when one thinks about it — what does? There is always a gap between what one thinks a work should be, and what one can actually make. With patience and practice the gap narrows, but it never really closes. So perhaps it’s unrealistic — not to mention harmful — to hold oneself to the expectation that things should always be perfect; that it’s only when they’re complete when they have worth.
Because even incompleteness can have value. I’m trying to learn that, so as not to toss so many of my efforts aside. Even incompleteness, even flawed work, can mean something. Maybe I can learn to call it potential. Growth.
The image is of an illustration I’ve been working on for several months, on and off, whenever my hands and my eyes can manage it. Not a long time compared to some of my other work, but it’s more demanding than the others because of the way I need to do the strokes.
And it’s not perfect. It’s still incomplete. That’s fine, though — I’ll keep trying. And I won’t say that I’ll hit all my marks. But to not disregard what I’m working on; to respect it and to esteem it because if nothing else, imperfect and incomplete as it may be, it means work and patience and time, means learning — that in itself is enough, I think.
It isn’t everything. But incompleteness doesn’t necessarily mean inadequacy.